We're just entering our seventh month of TTC - or 'Trying To Conceive'. I've joined up to a couple of forums to chat with other women who are trying to get pregnant and that's about the only acronym I can remember... and I've still no idea what 'evap' is.
There seem to be babies everywhere - even on the Audi advert at the cinema. We turn on the TV and we have recordings of Jane the Virgin. Laura Diamond thinks she's pregnant. We decided to try to finish off the Friends DVDs and realised that we're watching the series where Emma's just been born and Monica and Chandler are trying for a baby. And if you've read the latest Harry Dresden? Well, you'll know.
I also seem to be at the age where all the women I went to school with are either pregnant or have just had babies.
Last year after my sister-in-law got pregnant she told us that they'd decided she'd come off the pill and they'd 'just see what happened' - you know, oh-so-casually. I usually have the Jeremy Kyle show on while I'm cooking and, as you'll know if you've ever watched it, it seems the contestants (yes, I call them 'contestants') just need to message someone on Facebook and they get pregnant. There was a girl on there the other day - she'd been with her boyfriend for nine weeks... and she was nine weeks pregnant.
It seems to be so easy for everyone else.
Realistically, I know that it takes time - about 6 -12 months for the average couple - and that in the grand scheme of things, compared to some couples that try for years, 7 months isn't a great amount of time. But the frustration is starting to set in.
Also, if you've ever read online articles on how to get pregnant, the information is confusing. I've read baby/pregnancy-related sites that say the only time to try is around the time of ovulation (and if you miss that 48 hour window, you're stuffed) and I've read the NHS website that said a woman could get pregnant at any time of the cycle - which is always what I was taught growing up. My mother used to tell me that my reproductive system was always trying to get pregnant, working against me at every turn, so I'd sort of assumed that when I came off the pill last year that getting pregnant would be pretty quick. If I'd have known then what I now know about the process I'd have come off the pill much earlier.
The other part of the frustration is not knowing what's going on. I've thought I might be pregnant a couple of times but the tests were always negative (obviously, otherwise this would a less frustrated post!). To SBB I've likened the process to being blindfolded and being asked to throw a dart. At a moving board. In the dark. Whilst you yourself are being spun in the opposite direction to the board.
Luckily, SBB is remaining quite positive and supportive but I know he's starting to feel left behind too. He's a great believer in things happening for a reason, and usually I am too, but I'm also impatient - I want to know what the reason is and what sort of timescale we're looking at!